Autism and Mismatched Socks

 A couple of months ago, I was visiting a friend and his children. One of their children is a seven-year-old with Autism.  When I popped in, me and the dad talked about sports (Padres versus Cubs, go Padres!). While we were chatting, the child came out and began putting on his socks, which were two different colors. The mom giggled and chided him that his socks did not match. I laughed as well and lifted my pants leg to reveal that I too, had mismatched socks. The surprise on her face was both priceless and a reaffirmation of why I do what I do and love it.

I always wear mismatched socks. Why? Because as someone with Autism who works with Autistic individuals of varying ages, and has two Autistic kids, I know how we as people can get pigeonholed into a model based on movies like “Rain Man”. Well, as many people are discovering, it is not that cut-and-dry, and I think it is a tragedy and an overall failing that this perception is so ingrained into our collective society.

So, why mismatched socks? So often, as a Behavior Technician, I have watched as parents, peers, and even other professionals have suppressed rather than reinforced self-expression and individuality. My kids had ABA and most of them were amazing, dedicated people, but I also had to deal with ones who tried to mold my kids to be “less embarrassing,” one suggesting that they wanted them to conform to society’s norms.

Thus, when I visit clients, I always, without fail, wear clearly mismatching socks. I want my clients and even other kids I meet to understand that it’s ok to stand out. Besides, who looks at people’s socks anyways? So, in my viewpoint, it is a small, safe, first step towards a child or adult, getting themselves out there and embracing their right to be different, unique, and understanding that being accepted for who they are is an expectation, not a privilege. This is exactly how I view Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI); all are welcome, and save the judgment for “The Gong Show.”

PS: My socks right now are a solid black with emojis on it and an orange and blue, `nuff said.